It made me angry

While in Africa we had the privilage to go on a trip with an AIDS councilor called Lavisa.
It was a heart wrenching and thought provoking day.
We visited one amazing lady whose story has left its mark on me.

Her first husband was a business man who often went to the city for his work.
One weekend he never came back.
He was shot.

She remarried, and had children with another man, and life seemed good.
Till she found out she had AIDS.

She lost everything.
Her husband left her.
She had to move back to her mum's house. Away from her children.

As we spoke with her, I could feel something in myself burning.
She answered everything very graciously. Even questions that I probably shouldn't have asked.
Eventually I asked the one question that was aching in my heart.

"Are you angry that your husband left you?"
"Yes, I am"
Such a simple answer, but it hit me with such force.
It was honest, direct, and delivered with the same calmness as she had answered everything else.

What do you say to that?
What do you say when all you want to do is to cry because of the pain and hurt?

"So am I"

Some thing in my being tells me that God feels the same way.